Success In A Muslim Marriage
Marriage in any religion or culture is a big step to take, committing yourself to someone who you want to spend the rest of your life with is no easy decision.
For you to have a successful marriage, you must keep choosing to stay married and work on it no matter the challenges and obstacles that you might face as an individual or as a couple.
Traditional Islam marriages are a ceremonious and joyful occasion that combines families together even before the marriage is legal under civil law.
What’s so Special About in a Muslim Marriage?
The Muslim marriage ceremony or the Nikah is the contract that both parties enter that binds them together as husband and wife. This traditional wedding might differ in customs depending on which country you are living in, but they all have standard practices.
Firstly, this marriage is based on the consent of both parties. No Muslim marriage can be done if any of the couple is forced or being pressured to get married for any reason other than they want to be married.
Secondly, the nikah contract can be negotiated until both parties are happy with it. The husband and wife are equals and are treated as such by having the same opportunities as their spouse.
10 Tips on How to Make a Success of a Muslim Marriage:
For any marriage to be successful there are a few key points that forms the basis of the relationship. These points apply to both people in the marriage and if not taken into consideration can risk destroying the marriage and having to end up in divorce.
Here are the 10 points you should follow to make a success out of your marriage.
Remember that you are choosing your partner- An important aspect before you get married is to choose someone that you want to get married to. Not your family or anyone else who might think that the “potential” person is a good match for you.
There is no right age to get married or be married at- Most people want to marry young and start a family. However, you should first achieve most of your personal goals before you can start building with someone else. Marriage takes time, effort and commitment and you might end up growing apart as it is for young couples to do instead of making a success of your marriage.
Set personal standards for your future spouse- Knowing the type of person you want to marry is a great advantage, it will help you to scratch out the qualities you don’t want in a person or for your future. Have your standards in place but also be sure to possess those standards yourself.
Consider your families opinions-
It is only fair that if you should meet someone, your family gets to meet them before you get married. In some cases, your family or friends will not have the same ideas, or feelings that you have about this person. Hear them out.
If there are more negatives than positives, you might have to consider breaking it off and finding someone more suited to at least have your family's liking if you aren’t able to convince them to change their feelings or see what you see.
Don’t be engaged for too long- Being engaged for a long period of time only delays the process of getting married. Spacing out your wedding day to a day in the far future (excuse the redundancy) only leaves room for cold feet and might risk cancelling the wedding as you get to know the person throughout this waiting period.
Have a civil wedding first- As in the Muslim traditions require the Nikah ceremony as well, make sure that you do the civil wedding first, this makes you husband and wife legally according to the state. In the event of a divorce, or a spouse dies you are entitled to the benefits owed or left to you by your husband.
It's not only about a big wedding- It is true that most people view their wedding day as the biggest day of their lives, however, a small and intimate wedding serves the same purpose. Spending the most money and having the best ceremony does not a marriage make. Ensure that you and your spouse have the same attitude towards making the marriage a success.
Having an open and honest way of communicating saves your spouse the hassle of assuming. Speaking on what is bothering you whether in marriage, work or just an individual problem can help them to understand and work towards a solution to resolve the matter or assist in bettering the situation.
Give your spouse time to themselves-
Living together and always being in your spouse’s space can be overwhelming at times. Other times, work stress or outside factors can be overwhelming too. This leads to a build up of frustration and can cause resentment. Your spouse and you are both entitled to having your own free time, to unwind or relax without you being in their personal space.
Allow yourselves the opportunity to have your own time without feeling guilty of not spending it with your partner.
Have tolerance for your husband/wife-
Tolerating your husband or wife’s attitude or behavior can be a bit daunting at times. You should always remember that different situations, events, and circumstances can cause your spouse to act outside their usual selves.
Have a conversation with your spouse about the behavior or attitude that might cause the comfortability within the marriage and remember that your partner is only human, and people make mistakes.